So I'm going to post a quick howdy-do in order to get yesterday's post off the top of my screen.
Howdy-do!
How was everyone's holiday? Mine was great. We got to see several family members, and everyone got very nice gifts. P received a new sewing machine (she's 8...what was Santa thinking?), and the boys received the Lego Millenium Falcon as a joint gift from mom-in-law. It had over a thousand pieces, but somehow the boys were able to get it put together in record time. And without killing each other, if you can believe that.
Han Solo would be proud.
I received several wonderful gifts from my hubby. He took my Christmas list to heart! I received two Kelly Clarkson CDs (Yes, I am in fact 17. Shut up.). I also got some Anais Anais perfume (hubs calls it Anus Anus; ain't that funny?), some scrapbook supplies, a subscription to Rachael Ray Everyday magazine, and some essential oils to make the house smell scrumptious. Today's scent: Oh Christmas Tree. I like the pine smell around this time of year. As soon as the tree comes down, I think I'll switch over to the Christmas Memories oil. Get it? Since Christmas will be a memory? Ha, me funny.
Speaking of haha, did you guys know that Dollar Tree has Christmas stuff at half-price? Everything in the store is already just a dollar, so it seems funny to me that they'd drop it all down to fifty cents. I don't know why, but that just makes me laugh. Tuesday I laughed all the way to the bank, because the kids and I stocked up on little Christmas trees and silk poinsettia bunches and miniature light sets for fifty cents a pop. Man, I love deals.
That's about it from this little 'burb of Houston. We have no plans for New Year's Eve, darn it, so I don't foresee a cool "here's how drunk I got" post next week. But if things change and I do imbibe a bit, at least I won't freak myself out when I come here to post and find myself staring back at me. Yikes.
Friday, December 30, 2005
Wednesday, December 28, 2005
Little ol' me
Hey, it's me!
Yep, that's really me - in all my wavy-haired, smiley-faced glory. I'd just bought the teeniest little digital camera (five bucks on Target clearance rack - SCORE!) and was playing with it by taking pictures of, well, myself. I took about three thousand shots before I got one that I was willing to share on the Internet. Meaning: The picture looks like a version of me that *I* think I look like most of the time, and not one of the eleventy kajillion pictures that absolutely do NOT look like me. (Why oh why does smiling give you wrinkly eyes and double chins? Unfair, I say.)
So, there ya go. Howdy, world.
Yep, that's really me - in all my wavy-haired, smiley-faced glory. I'd just bought the teeniest little digital camera (five bucks on Target clearance rack - SCORE!) and was playing with it by taking pictures of, well, myself. I took about three thousand shots before I got one that I was willing to share on the Internet. Meaning: The picture looks like a version of me that *I* think I look like most of the time, and not one of the eleventy kajillion pictures that absolutely do NOT look like me. (Why oh why does smiling give you wrinkly eyes and double chins? Unfair, I say.)
So, there ya go. Howdy, world.
Sunday, December 25, 2005
Hubby's Christmas gift
Well, the big one anyway. (Sorry for the crummy pics):
He's been wanting a grandfather clock for a l-o-n-g time, and I came across a great deal on one back in November. It's really nice looking, and the chimes are great, too. Best of all, it's powered by winding - no batteries. (Apparently battery-operated grandfather clocks are the root of all evil.) heh
He's been wanting a grandfather clock for a l-o-n-g time, and I came across a great deal on one back in November. It's really nice looking, and the chimes are great, too. Best of all, it's powered by winding - no batteries. (Apparently battery-operated grandfather clocks are the root of all evil.) heh
Sunday, December 18, 2005
Where's my stuff?
Like most Americans, many of my Christmas gifts were ordered through Amazon.com. I was so proud of myself - got all the stuff I wanted, got it all on sale, and got it ordered early. I've been preening around here like I'm all that with butter, because I'm ahead of the game this year!
Not so fast, kemosabe.
Day before yesterday, I got an email from Amazon which basically stated that some of my stuff had been returned to them as "undeliverable." I was like, this has GOT to be spam, because I'm all that with butter. But nope. Turns out, I'm not all that, and apparently I have no butter, as Amazon shipped all my stuff (probably my butter, too) to my OLD address.
I *know* I changed that address back in November, because my daughter's Barbie karaoke machine was shipped, via Amazon, right here to our current residence. I have since learned that what I actually changed was the shipping address, not the default address. Dude, that hurts.
So now I sit here in a panic with the rest of the free world, wondering how the heck I'm going to get all those items back in time for Christmas. I'm fairly sure that ordering online is out, because shipping prices and times are insane this week. And now the kids are out of school for Christmas, so they'll have to be with me when I go shopping. And worst of all is the fact that I will no longer be able to score such great deals - I've not seen the gift I bought for my father-in-law ANYWHERE for less than fifty bucks. (I'd ordered it for a fraction of that through Amazon.)
Everyone, hear me. Learn from my mistakes. Always check your shipping address when you order something online. And while you're at it, pass the butter, would you?
Not so fast, kemosabe.
Day before yesterday, I got an email from Amazon which basically stated that some of my stuff had been returned to them as "undeliverable." I was like, this has GOT to be spam, because I'm all that with butter. But nope. Turns out, I'm not all that, and apparently I have no butter, as Amazon shipped all my stuff (probably my butter, too) to my OLD address.
I *know* I changed that address back in November, because my daughter's Barbie karaoke machine was shipped, via Amazon, right here to our current residence. I have since learned that what I actually changed was the shipping address, not the default address. Dude, that hurts.
So now I sit here in a panic with the rest of the free world, wondering how the heck I'm going to get all those items back in time for Christmas. I'm fairly sure that ordering online is out, because shipping prices and times are insane this week. And now the kids are out of school for Christmas, so they'll have to be with me when I go shopping. And worst of all is the fact that I will no longer be able to score such great deals - I've not seen the gift I bought for my father-in-law ANYWHERE for less than fifty bucks. (I'd ordered it for a fraction of that through Amazon.)
Everyone, hear me. Learn from my mistakes. Always check your shipping address when you order something online. And while you're at it, pass the butter, would you?
Saturday, December 17, 2005
No!
Here is a list of things I do not want to do. I am, at this moment, crabby as hell; therefore it is likely I will name some things which I do actually want to do eventually.
But for now, I don't want to do these things. Not in this lifetime; not ever. I will never change my mind. Unless I do, in which case everyone is entitled to say...eh, please don't say anything. I hate "I told you so."
Onwards.
1. I do not want to go back to school in the spring.
2. I do not want my eyes examined, unless it it guaranteed I can have Lasik. Because I know I will need it. My eyesight is getting worse.
3. I do not want to cry, yet here I go.
4. I do not want to see "The Passion of the Christ." I consider myself a Christian, I know that Jesus died for my sins, and overall I am aware of his plight. No, I may not fully appreciate the intense manner in which he was killed, but it's MY decision not to see a movie about it if I choose not to. It's a movie, darnit. Come on.
5. I do not want to see another animated movie. (Unless, perhaps, it's done by Pixar, whose work I generally love.) If not wanting to pay for and sit through two-hour cartoons makes me a bad parent, well, OH MY GOSH, who died and made YOU judge?!
6. I do not want to buy a Bible for my daughter that has cartoony bugs on the cover.
7. I do not want to ... crap, I can't say that one out loud.
8. I do not want to watch the Lord of the Rings trilogy unless I decide to on my own. (What's with all the forced movie-watching? Enough already.)
9. I do not want to drive a minivan all my life. (I don't know where that came from....)
10. I do not want to use four ellipses at the end of a sentence. Three is enough. Who taught me that crappy rule?
11. I do not want to wrap presents that I did not purchase.
12. I do not want to miss Evil Amy's email, but it's not in any of my inboxes.
13. I do not want to whine about my life, as it's really pretty good. But whee! Here I go. Again.
14. I do not want to sit at home with my kids all next week.
15. I do not want to make plans every day while my kids are home all next week.
16. I do not want to go to the post office next week.
17. I do not want to buy more Christmas presents.
18. I do not want to miss Saturday Night Live. So that about wraps it up.
Have a good weekend.
But for now, I don't want to do these things. Not in this lifetime; not ever. I will never change my mind. Unless I do, in which case everyone is entitled to say...eh, please don't say anything. I hate "I told you so."
Onwards.
1. I do not want to go back to school in the spring.
2. I do not want my eyes examined, unless it it guaranteed I can have Lasik. Because I know I will need it. My eyesight is getting worse.
3. I do not want to cry, yet here I go.
4. I do not want to see "The Passion of the Christ." I consider myself a Christian, I know that Jesus died for my sins, and overall I am aware of his plight. No, I may not fully appreciate the intense manner in which he was killed, but it's MY decision not to see a movie about it if I choose not to. It's a movie, darnit. Come on.
5. I do not want to see another animated movie. (Unless, perhaps, it's done by Pixar, whose work I generally love.) If not wanting to pay for and sit through two-hour cartoons makes me a bad parent, well, OH MY GOSH, who died and made YOU judge?!
6. I do not want to buy a Bible for my daughter that has cartoony bugs on the cover.
7. I do not want to ... crap, I can't say that one out loud.
8. I do not want to watch the Lord of the Rings trilogy unless I decide to on my own. (What's with all the forced movie-watching? Enough already.)
9. I do not want to drive a minivan all my life. (I don't know where that came from....)
10. I do not want to use four ellipses at the end of a sentence. Three is enough. Who taught me that crappy rule?
11. I do not want to wrap presents that I did not purchase.
12. I do not want to miss Evil Amy's email, but it's not in any of my inboxes.
13. I do not want to whine about my life, as it's really pretty good. But whee! Here I go. Again.
14. I do not want to sit at home with my kids all next week.
15. I do not want to make plans every day while my kids are home all next week.
16. I do not want to go to the post office next week.
17. I do not want to buy more Christmas presents.
18. I do not want to miss Saturday Night Live. So that about wraps it up.
Have a good weekend.
Chronicles of Narnia
Good movie. The battle scenes may be a tad over the top for, say, five year olds and younger, but overall I do recommend it.
It's a little long, though - about 2:20. Something to keep in mind when you're choosing a movie to see with your little ones.
Awesome cinematography. Pretty actors. Cool wardrobe! Go see it if you get a chance.
See, hubby? I did not think it sucked at all.
It's a little long, though - about 2:20. Something to keep in mind when you're choosing a movie to see with your little ones.
Awesome cinematography. Pretty actors. Cool wardrobe! Go see it if you get a chance.
See, hubby? I did not think it sucked at all.
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
Too hung over to take the kids to church
We-ellll, as you have probably gleaned from the title, last weekend was a doozy. (Doozie? Doozy? Doozy.) A former co-worker of hubby's held her annual Christmas gathering, to which we were invited. There were bushels of food, and pecks of liquor. It was like, deck the halls with boughs of wine. Thank goodness, too, since I knew exactly 3.5 people at this gathering, and my shy side was coming out. I just had to drown her with four large glasses of red wine, y'all. There is no shyness allowed at holiday parties, you know. Not at the fun ones, anyway.
So at the start, there I was, being all bored and stuff. I was chatting with a very nice lady (one of the 3.5 - she's the .5). But then she got up to greet a new arrival, and I was left alone in my uncomfortable straight-backed chair. Hubby was talking to Someformercoworker, which was fine, but I was bored. Then I was offered a glass of wine, and it was like manna from heaven. Okay, not really, but at the time it sure sounded good.
Partway through my first glass of wine, a couple comes in. The wife used to work with hubby; her husband is a self-made, fairly wealthy businessman. Oh, and also an ass. When I first met him, we were standing near the hors d'oeuvres table, and I was telling him that figleaf-wrapped rice bites were not as good as they sounded (gag). Two sentences later, he's telling me, "My wife doesn't draw a paycheck anymore." After I got over my initial reaction of "Figleaf...paycheck...wha??", I started thinking, "Hey, ass, you've got two beautiful daughters that your wife takes care of (thank God they both took after HER). Let's see a little respect, 'k?"
I left at that point, but a few minutes later, I'm somehow drawn into a conversation with my hubby, the ass, his wife, and some other people outside that familiar 3.5. Ass turns to me and this exchange follows:
Ass: "Do you work?"
Ass's wife: "She has three kids; of course she works."
Pley: "Yes, I'm a stay-at-home-parent."
Ass: "Do you draw a paycheck?"
Pley (thinking he's deaf; he can't be that stupid): "I, um, share with hubby."
Ass: "But how do you earn your spending money?"
Pley (gawd, I can't stand it anymore): "In the bedroom, of course."
Then I walked away, picking up dropped jaws all around. It was freakin' awesome.
The rest of the evening was not so much fun, although the wine did help me have several conversations with fascinating people who shall remain nameless because I cannot remember their names. Or faces. Or whether they were real people or actually lampshades.
I got violently ill later that night, and vowed once again (say it with me): NO DRINKING ON AN EMPTY STOMACH! This happens to me once every five years whether I like it or not (Not). You'd think I'd have learned by now.
And thus the title of this essay. I was still ill the next morning, and we all missed church. Which is a shame, actually, because I'm sure the pastor would have loved to hear about how I earn my spending money.
So at the start, there I was, being all bored and stuff. I was chatting with a very nice lady (one of the 3.5 - she's the .5). But then she got up to greet a new arrival, and I was left alone in my uncomfortable straight-backed chair. Hubby was talking to Someformercoworker, which was fine, but I was bored. Then I was offered a glass of wine, and it was like manna from heaven. Okay, not really, but at the time it sure sounded good.
Partway through my first glass of wine, a couple comes in. The wife used to work with hubby; her husband is a self-made, fairly wealthy businessman. Oh, and also an ass. When I first met him, we were standing near the hors d'oeuvres table, and I was telling him that figleaf-wrapped rice bites were not as good as they sounded (gag). Two sentences later, he's telling me, "My wife doesn't draw a paycheck anymore." After I got over my initial reaction of "Figleaf...paycheck...wha??", I started thinking, "Hey, ass, you've got two beautiful daughters that your wife takes care of (thank God they both took after HER). Let's see a little respect, 'k?"
I left at that point, but a few minutes later, I'm somehow drawn into a conversation with my hubby, the ass, his wife, and some other people outside that familiar 3.5. Ass turns to me and this exchange follows:
Ass: "Do you work?"
Ass's wife: "She has three kids; of course she works."
Pley: "Yes, I'm a stay-at-home-parent."
Ass: "Do you draw a paycheck?"
Pley (thinking he's deaf; he can't be that stupid): "I, um, share with hubby."
Ass: "But how do you earn your spending money?"
Pley (gawd, I can't stand it anymore): "In the bedroom, of course."
Then I walked away, picking up dropped jaws all around. It was freakin' awesome.
The rest of the evening was not so much fun, although the wine did help me have several conversations with fascinating people who shall remain nameless because I cannot remember their names. Or faces. Or whether they were real people or actually lampshades.
I got violently ill later that night, and vowed once again (say it with me): NO DRINKING ON AN EMPTY STOMACH! This happens to me once every five years whether I like it or not (Not). You'd think I'd have learned by now.
And thus the title of this essay. I was still ill the next morning, and we all missed church. Which is a shame, actually, because I'm sure the pastor would have loved to hear about how I earn my spending money.
Friday, December 02, 2005
Christmas list
Believe it or not, I've completed most of my Christmas shopping. Yay! I'd love to list it all here, because I got some AWESOME deals, but I can't because my entire freaking family reads this blog. Gah!
Kimmer, I'll email you what I got for hubby, cuz you're special. ;)
So today I went to Tnk's house to help her unpack some stuff. We got a LOT of kitchen stuff put away, then we put the empty boxes out for the garbageman (funny how that made the kitchen seem ten times bigger). Then we went to IHOP for lunch, and we were good girls. Sis had the fruit and yogurt plate, and I had the low-carb chicken/broccoli/salad plate. It was hard to pass up the yummy-looking burgers and stuffed French toast, especially since we were starving, so I'm especially proud of us. Yay, Tnk-n-Pl3y!
By the way, Tnk is looking all hot now. She doesn't see it, but she's definitely lost weight since she started doing police work. Beeyotch.
Kidding on the beeyotch part. I don't want a ticket. Love you, sis!
So, in honor of eating well lately, my sis-in-law and bro-in-law are bringing over chili and chocolate cake tomorrow. (Have I mentioned they're coming over to watch the UT vs. Colorado championship game? Well, they are.) I'm thinking salad is on the menu for dinner tonight. Phooey. Eating healthy stinks sometimes. Okay, it stinks ALL the time.
Back to that first paragraph - turns out I'm not as done as I'd thought. I still have to get stocking stuffers. That can be either fun or torture, depending on the recipient. I mean, I'm sure my mother-in-law loves Carmex and Altoids, but how much is Santa allowed to bring to her before she starts asking WTHeck? (She doesn't curse. Much.) She'll be all, "Where's my jewelry?", and I'll be all, "Dang, woman, I already spent $9.37 on you; WTHeck?" (I don't curse much, either. Hey, stop judging me.)
Okay, I've actually spent more than nine bucks and change on her. Just so ya know. I'm not THAT cheap. ;)
By the way, if anyone has inexpensive stocking stuffer ideas (note my careful non-usage of the word "cheap"), please post them in the comments section.
Oh, and thanks to all who said my house was purdy. I just have to admit that I completely agree with you. I feel very fortunate to live here; I just adore this place. [contented sigh]
Kimmer, I'll email you what I got for hubby, cuz you're special. ;)
So today I went to Tnk's house to help her unpack some stuff. We got a LOT of kitchen stuff put away, then we put the empty boxes out for the garbageman (funny how that made the kitchen seem ten times bigger). Then we went to IHOP for lunch, and we were good girls. Sis had the fruit and yogurt plate, and I had the low-carb chicken/broccoli/salad plate. It was hard to pass up the yummy-looking burgers and stuffed French toast, especially since we were starving, so I'm especially proud of us. Yay, Tnk-n-Pl3y!
By the way, Tnk is looking all hot now. She doesn't see it, but she's definitely lost weight since she started doing police work. Beeyotch.
Kidding on the beeyotch part. I don't want a ticket. Love you, sis!
So, in honor of eating well lately, my sis-in-law and bro-in-law are bringing over chili and chocolate cake tomorrow. (Have I mentioned they're coming over to watch the UT vs. Colorado championship game? Well, they are.) I'm thinking salad is on the menu for dinner tonight. Phooey. Eating healthy stinks sometimes. Okay, it stinks ALL the time.
Back to that first paragraph - turns out I'm not as done as I'd thought. I still have to get stocking stuffers. That can be either fun or torture, depending on the recipient. I mean, I'm sure my mother-in-law loves Carmex and Altoids, but how much is Santa allowed to bring to her before she starts asking WTHeck? (She doesn't curse. Much.) She'll be all, "Where's my jewelry?", and I'll be all, "Dang, woman, I already spent $9.37 on you; WTHeck?" (I don't curse much, either. Hey, stop judging me.)
Okay, I've actually spent more than nine bucks and change on her. Just so ya know. I'm not THAT cheap. ;)
By the way, if anyone has inexpensive stocking stuffer ideas (note my careful non-usage of the word "cheap"), please post them in the comments section.
Oh, and thanks to all who said my house was purdy. I just have to admit that I completely agree with you. I feel very fortunate to live here; I just adore this place. [contented sigh]
Thursday, December 01, 2005
Pondering/Wondering: What's the diff, really?
Today I am specifically wondering if I'll ever get used to one of my kids not getting off the bus as they usually do. K is staying after school this afternoon in order to participate in Karma Chamel...er, Culture Club. The school bus just came and went, and even though I *knew* K wouldn't be getting off, my heart did a little flip-flop when the bus went by without stopping.
Weird stuff, parenting.
In other news: I'm also wondering why I cannot sleep when I am hot. I mean, I canNOT sleep unless there is a chill of some sort in the air. Last night was one of those times, which is odd because it was 40 degrees outside and the heater was off. I tossed and turned until 2:00 a.m., and as a result, I have been yawning all day. In fact, here comes one now....
[YAWN!]
Better get myself another hit of hot tea. Unfortunately, it's decaf, which won't help with the yawny situation, but at least the activity of it will keep me awake.
Oh, today I scrapbooked four lousy pages. It's not that I didn't have the supplies, or that S and I gossiped too much. Nothing interesting like that. Apparently, this is what happens when you have not scrapped in eleven months - you get out of the groove. (Has anyone seen Stella? Perhaps she can help me get it back.)
Tonight P has a Girl Scout meeting, but before that, we have to drive up to the school to get K. I can't wait to hear how the Boy George meeting went. (Okay, yes, I've got to stop that. But not just yet. heehee)
One more pondering: I got another free newspaper tossed onto my lawn today. Thank you, Houston Chronicle, for giving me another free crossword puzzle to do. Now my coffee shant be lonely.
Oops, thought I was done, but this just hit me: I also wonder why the neighbors are still paying a lawn service to mow when the grass ain't growing anymore. (I hear the buzz of the mowers and blowers as I type this. Hello, it's December.) I do realize why the lawn guys are doing it (cha-ching!), but *I* sure as heck wouldn't be paying someone to pretend to cut my grass. Must be nice to have disposable income. Maybe they could dispose some my way.
And with that, I must leave you. It's time to pick up K!
Weird stuff, parenting.
In other news: I'm also wondering why I cannot sleep when I am hot. I mean, I canNOT sleep unless there is a chill of some sort in the air. Last night was one of those times, which is odd because it was 40 degrees outside and the heater was off. I tossed and turned until 2:00 a.m., and as a result, I have been yawning all day. In fact, here comes one now....
[YAWN!]
Better get myself another hit of hot tea. Unfortunately, it's decaf, which won't help with the yawny situation, but at least the activity of it will keep me awake.
Oh, today I scrapbooked four lousy pages. It's not that I didn't have the supplies, or that S and I gossiped too much. Nothing interesting like that. Apparently, this is what happens when you have not scrapped in eleven months - you get out of the groove. (Has anyone seen Stella? Perhaps she can help me get it back.)
Tonight P has a Girl Scout meeting, but before that, we have to drive up to the school to get K. I can't wait to hear how the Boy George meeting went. (Okay, yes, I've got to stop that. But not just yet. heehee)
One more pondering: I got another free newspaper tossed onto my lawn today. Thank you, Houston Chronicle, for giving me another free crossword puzzle to do. Now my coffee shant be lonely.
Oops, thought I was done, but this just hit me: I also wonder why the neighbors are still paying a lawn service to mow when the grass ain't growing anymore. (I hear the buzz of the mowers and blowers as I type this. Hello, it's December.) I do realize why the lawn guys are doing it (cha-ching!), but *I* sure as heck wouldn't be paying someone to pretend to cut my grass. Must be nice to have disposable income. Maybe they could dispose some my way.
And with that, I must leave you. It's time to pick up K!
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